My own temptations

I laid in his arms for the longest time, four hours had passed since I last looked at the clock. We talked, laughed and kissed like everything was normal again and nothing had happened to interrupt our happiness. Only I knew it did and I knew we weren't out of it yet. His weakened state pulled him into a deep sleep. The sounds of his even breathing and steady heartbeat was almost enough to make me sleep...only I don't sleep unless it's day. That was where I was cursed to never sleep when I wanted to.

His words continued to replay in my head about a DVD I needed to see. Something I needed to know, the same something Kiara knew. It put fear inside of me, so bad I almost didn't want to know. I slowly made my way out of the bed and snuck up to the first floor to make some calls. One to get a new phone, two to get Quinn's rental car delivered to my home. They would be here in an hour and then....then I would know.

"Jessica?" I turned to see a male donor I'd forgotten I'd called for right before Bill had showed up. Narrowing my eyes I realized he looked familiar and stepped forward. I recognized him from Fangtasia...I'd fed on him before in the bathroom.



Feeling ashamed and remembering he was the one I'd fed on and broken my vow to Hoyt to never feed on another guy. I looked away from him and spoke low. "What are you doing here?"

"I got a call from work that I was needed as a donor. I wasn't expecting...I mean I didn't know..."

I shook my head. "Yeah, it's...fine. I uh...can you just give me a few?"

"Yeah, sure. I'll wait in here." He pointed to the living room and I turned away from him, my eyes wide. I remembered how he tasted and gods was it good. Instantly at the thought my fangs dropped and I closed my eyes tightly willing them to go away. Finally they retracted and I exhaled slowly, opening my eyes. Headlights broke my thoughts and I headed outside to greet the rental company driver.

"Thanks I just need to get the bags out and you can take it back." He nodded and handed me the keys. I grabbed the black bag he told me about and a few other things, signed the papers and let him leave. Walking back inside I saw him watching my every move and contemplated telling him he could go...but I was hungry and he would be a great treat. But should I? Could I?

I set the bag on the counter and looked over at him as he stood and slid his hands in his pockets. "You're a donor? I thought you were just some random guy at Fangtasia."

He chuckled, "Well, I was. I didn't know how much I liked being bitten until...you. Small world right?" I looked down at my hands and felt so many things I couldn't explain. So much was happening to me right now and here I was thinking of having sex with this guy. Why? Because...that was all I could come up with...just because it might help the pain. I STILL couldn't get those images out of my head. They haunted me, enticed me, teased me...I had to get through this, I had to get past it.

I nearly jumped when I felt his warm hand on my arm and pulled away from him, recoiling from the touch. "Hey, sorry I didn't mean to startle you." He grinned and I sighed heavily.

"It's okay..I'm just...there's a lot going on right now."

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

"I--Well I mean you wouldn't really understand."

"Try me."

I allowed him to take my hand and lead me into the living room where the couch was, taking a seat at the far end as he sat on the other. Watching him remove his black leather jacket, his jugular throbbing under his skin, my mouth watering. I looked down at my hands and turned the engagement ring around on my finger.

"You're marrying that guy you were with that night?"

His question made me look up and think back to Hoyt. I smiled softly and shook my head. "No, his name's Quinn...well John but everyone calls him Quinn."

"Is he the problem?"

I paused and looked out at the floor, was he the problem? No, life in general was the problem...uncertainty and fear was the problem. What was on that DVD was the problem...My anger seemed to spike a bit and I shook my head. "No."

He moved closer to me and I stiffened, not really knowing what to do or if I could control myself. I just wanted Quinn to hold me, be back to normal and not addicted to V. I wished I could press rewind and never let him drink from me. He touched my leg and my fangs dropped. Thank them for always betraying me at the WRONG times. I closed my mouth to hide them and he turned his palm up to reveal his wrist. "If you're hungry..."

I swallowed hard and before I could stop myself I was on top of him and sinking my fangs into his neck. His hands were on my back, moving up my shirt and I could feel his crotch harden and jerk. I couldn't stop, even when he used his strength to sit up, I straddled him and continued to drink. The warm liquid going down my throat with such ease, filling and sating my hunger. His soft lips touched my bare shoulder and I withdrew my fangs from his neck and looked into his eyes.

"This...can't happen. I...can't...we can't..." I made sure my words were clear and he seemed to understand. Until he kissed me and flew across the room and shook my head. "You should go."

"But..let me exp--"

"GO!" He sighed and grabbed his jacket, turned and left the room. I covered my eyes and retracted my fangs. I felt satisfied with the blood but I felt horrible that I'd fed on him like that. Licking my lips free of the excess blood I dropped my hands and went to the kitchen counter to watch the DVD so I could get back to Quinn's side.

I grabbed my laptop and the DVD, placing it in the DVD player and waiting for it to load. It was an email that opened to reveal a video. I watched as Kiara came onto the screen.

Embedded was a short video of a fresh faced Kiara looking quite serious. She was sitting in her office at the compound, leaning close to the camera.

“Quinn, if you’re watching this, it means someone has compelled me to destroy the anti-glamour contacts. This is bad. I would never willingly do this. My best bet was that I’ve been glamoured but I cannot prove it” she began before her face got even more serious.

“DO NOT under any circumstances let me destroy these contacts. If I send an email asking for them disregard that email. Somehow…you need to find me… you need to prove whether or not I was glamoured” her face turned sad. “I would hate to think it is someone I trust… but right now… in this video, there is no one I can trust but you. You’ve lived among vampires and other creatures. If theres anyone who can hold his own and not have his views swayed is you”

She leaned back in her seat, looking defeated and frustrated “I may be in serious trouble Quinn… I trust you can get me out of wherever I am… I need you to check my activity. Knowing you, you can break into my secure server. Do it if you must. Check my recent emails, anything that proves I've been compromised. You know me... maybe even better than I know myself" she rubbed the bridge of her nose. "This video shows... I cannot even trust myself"

I brought my brows together as I tried to understand what was happening. Someone had glamoured Kiara to destroy her contacts that prevented glamouring? Who would do that? I continued to watch and the next video that played was of Bill and Kiara speaking. There was volume so I listened. Bill spoke evenly to her as he held her gaze and told her that she wanted to destroy all her contacts she'd made, and to stop searching for a vial of blood and to forget he'd glamoured her. He continued to go in depth in telling her to recall the contacts, notify Eric Northman that there was no vial and to stop searching for it because it's existence was nill.

I blinked hard and let the information set it, backing up towards the wall as I did. Realization hit me and hit me hard as I put it together. Bill did have a vial of blood...Lilith blood that would make him crazy. Had he taken it, that I didn't know. Bill wasn't who I thought he was...he glamoured the woman he claimed to love. That's what she got so upset over that night on the video. Oh my god...what did this mean?



I felt myself sink down to the floor and cover my mouth as I cried. Bill had lied to me...again. He was keeping things from me and I couldn't trust him. Closing my eyes tightly I covered my face and sobbed softly feeling like my world had crashed. I was losing Bill again, and this time I may not get him back.