pain and promise

Vincent looked at the drawer in the desk, tears in his eyes. He had hoped that he was wrong. He had hoped Quinn had just forgotten about those vials. He looked at the phone laying on the desk. This did not bode well for the future, but he had a task to complete. He pulled out his pda and tapped in a message, sending it and hoping that she would respond...

~Miss Hamby.
~Your presence is requested at the Quinn Estate at your earliest convenience. 
~We must discuss several matters that have come up.
~Warmest Regards
~Vincent Davis

He sent the message and waited to see what happened.

She was waiting for the go ahead to leave for New Orleans when her cell chimed and she looked down. Her stomach sank to her toes when she read the message from Vincent. Quinn....was he in trouble? With all that was going on she was torn between going and saving Bill. Standing, she looked at Eric. 

"I have to take care of something before we leave. Please don't leave without me. I'll be back soon." He just nodded and returned to talking to Sookie and the others about Bill. Kiara still hadn't shown up at Fangtasia to leave. So maybe she had some time. Speeding out of there, she gave it her all to run from Shreveport back to Bon Temps.

She was there in about twenty minutes, windblown hair. Knocking on the door, she waited anxiously and worriedly.

Vincent looked up at the monitor when he heard the sensor go off. Miss hamby...he tried to paste on a smile and buzzed the door so she could enter. This was going to be a long day. He was not sure how she would take the news. Hitting the intercom he spoke quietly.

"I'm in his office, Miss Hamby"

Hearing the intercom go off as the doors opened, she sped to his office and saw Vincent standing there. "What's wrong, what happened? Is he okay?" She hadn't heard from him in two nights and was still afraid to attempt to call or text him. That's when she saw his cell phone in Vincent's hand. It would have done no good. Looking back up, she met his pained eyes. "Vincent, what is it!"

"What's wrong, what happened? Is he okay? Vincent, what is it!"


Vincent looked down into the drawer. Quinn had not even bothered to replace the false bottom. 

"He's gone, Miss Hamby. He came back from your experience in Nevada....different...distant...strange. He took some things with him when he left that causes me concern, and only a vague idea of where he would be heading..."

He motioned to the now empty case where the Book of Lilith had resided.

"I must be honest, Miss Hamby. I do not know when, if ever, he will return. He did attempt to take care of you. He said you may remain with the company or not at your discretion. Your stipend from the company will continue in either case. If you choose to stay, you are to be invested with all the authority he had concerning the board and their decisions. I wanted to tell you face to face rather than over a phone. I thought you deserved at least that much."

Vincent could feel the tears falling but he ignored them, refusing to wipe them away.

"I am sorry, Miss Hamby, but I fear we may have lost him this time. He had always asked me to accompany him. This time he would not even consider it. Something is wrong, and he is seeking out a way to, as he put it, 'deal with his demons. I am not sure what demons were dredged up by what happened out there. He barely spoke when he returned. Just stared into the fireplace for hours. Then he announced he was leaving and left the instructions for your care. When I returned after setting things in motion, he was gone and this ~tossing the cell back on the desk~ was here. He took something that was hidden in a false drawer with him when he left, and it does not bode well. I just hope one day you and he can forgive me for what I did...he does not have what he thinks he does..."

She listened as he spoke, seeing Vincent cry was a whole other ball game. It broke her heart to see him so distraught. She backed up until her legs hit the chair and fell into it, staring into space as he continued, she was trying to wrap her head around it all, trying to make sense of it all. "But...I..." She shook her head and tried to figure out what it all meant before looking up at him.

"Victor did some...pretty awful things and he had to...well he had to act differently. I think. Tapping into that...into that dark part of him. They gave him V...lots of it. I--I couldn't stop them. He changed, he..." She looked at her nails. "He had to act like I didn't matter to him...which I'm not sure if it was an act." Looking back up at Vincent she sighed. "As for the company...I--I don't know. I just don't..." 

She wiped away her own blood tear and sniffled, looking down at the ring on her finger. The one thing she treasured and was thankful Victor did not touch. She looked up when he started to speak again.

"I am sorry, Miss Hamby, but I fear we may have lost him this time. He had always asked me to accompany him. This time he would not even consider it. Something is wrong, and he is seeking out a way to, as he put it, 'deal with his demons. I am not sure what demons were dredged up by what happened out there. He barely spoke when he returned. Just stared into the fireplace for hours. Then he announced he was leaving and left the instructions for your care. When I returned after setting things in motion, he was gone and this ~he tossed the cell back on the desk~ was here. He took something that was hidden in a false drawer with him when he left, and it does not bode well. I just hope one day you and he can forgive me for what I did...he does not have what he thinks he does..."

At first she just gaped at him not knowing what to stay. "What--what did he take? And what did you do?" She stood, getting anxious. "What is it Vincent, you have to tell me. Everything."

"What--what did he take? And what did you do? What is it Vincent, you have to tell me. Everything."


Vincent sighed. He was afraid she would ask about this...

"Miss Hamby, a little bit back, when he had his relapse, I found the false bottom and there were some vials in it. Some vials that were vampire blood. I had hoped he had simply forgotten about them. As a precaution, I took them and replaced them with something else."

He stood, finally wiping his eyes as he spoke.

"His taking that accursed book concerns me almost as much as the vials. He is feeling lost, Miss Hamby. People who are lost sometimes seek comfort in religion. The book brought nothing but anger and pain to him before, even if he could not see it himself. I asked him to burn it once. He said he wanted it as a reminder, so kept it in that damn case. Would that I had destroyed it when I had the chance...."

He moved to the sidebar and poured her a glass from the warmed blood sitting there, setting it next to her on the table before returning to lower himself into Quinn's chair.

"The vials contain a tainted mixture. There is a drop or two of vampire blood there so he would not realize the switch, but the rest is going to be what concerns me. It is a cocktail of his own blood, mine, and a hallucinogen of special manufacture. It is strong enough to effect even him. I don' know what will happen if he takes that blood in public, and it concerns me. I thought if he used it, it would be here, in a controlled environment where I could watch him. "

He looked to Jessica, tears rising in his eyes again...

"I am sorry Miss Hamby. My only duty was to take care of him, and in that I have failed you both."

Her mouth suddenly went dry as he explained about the book...it had to be the book of Lilith. The vampire Bible Bill wanted her to read at one point. She felt like she couldn't breathe, couldn't move. Frozen as she stared into space, listening to his words. She barely registered the glass of blood he sat next to her. Forcing herself to swallow, she listened to what the blood really was. Not knowing what it would do to him worried her, would she ever see him again? Could he survive this? Would he? She had so many questions and no answers. It was disheartening. She felt like someone punched her in the gut, hard. 

"But...but you have, you did...I mean you are. Vincent I--" She dropped her head into her hands and struggled to find the words. Looking up at him with tear brimmed eyes. "You haven't failed either of us...but I'm failing you. Bill is in trouble and I have to go to New Orleans...like yesterday. I...can't be there for Quinn like I want to be, and it's killing me. I--I don't know what I could do to help him anyhow. He doesn't want to be near me." She felt the tears fall and looked back down.

"He doesn't want to be near me."


Vincent looked up.

"Miss Hamby. You don't understand..."

He circled around the desk and lifted her chin so she would look at him.

"He left to protect you. He cannot control whatever this demon in him is. He swore he would not return until he could."

He let his hand drop.

"Mr Quinn cares so much about you that he has walked away from everything he knows and loves, you included, in order to protect you. He asked that, if only for the memories, you keep the ring. He said at least you will have that for the memories of the good times."

She lifted her head and looked at him, letting his words sink in. He left to protect her. He thinks that's protecting her, but really she viewed it as being stubborn. Why couldn't he stay and let her help him? Maybe he doubted she could, maybe Grace was where he was headed...she helped him once after all. 

Looking down at the ring after he mentioned Quinn saying to keep it, she pressed her lips together and slowly took it off, holding it between her index finger and thumb. "I'll always hold our memories." She looked up at him and stood. "If you hear from him, tell him to find me when he's ready. I think he needs his space to deal with what he's dealing with. And I understand that, I'm just sorry I couldn't help him through it." She grasped the ring in her palm tightly, then slipped it into her pocket for safe keeping.

Vincent sighed as he watched her remove the ring.

"I only wish I had been able to give you better news. Anything I learn you will know the same day. Perhaps just knowing that you are safe is all he needs right now. He is going to a place where there will be nobody.  A remote place where there are no people. He feels it is what he must do. All I know is that it is somewhere in India..."

"India...right. Of course." She hung her head and took a slow breath. Ignoring the pain all this was causing her. She had to push it to the back of her mind....right now her maker was in trouble and she had to focus. Walking up to Vincent, she wrapped her arms around him and hugged him. "Thank you Vincent. For everything." With that she stepped back and sped out of the room, heading back to Fangtasia. 

His name, his scent, his everything flooding her mind as she ran. The ring in her pocket, a constant reminder of what almost was. What could have been. It was everything she'd ever wanted...and it slipped through her grasp. Her tears fell down her face and she ran harder, running away from him and trying to leave his memory behind. He needed space, time to face his demons and get himself better. She'd give him time, after all, that's all she had now...hopefully.