Questions and Answers

James picked his way through the trees. He had followed her to this house, but he was not sure what to do now. The kiss he had seen confused him. She obviously still had feelings for this Quinn. He was unsure of where that left him, so here he was. He watched as she entered the house, pulling the pile of papers in with her and shutting the door. He could hear her crying and wanted to go to her, to comfort her. Was it his place to do that? Was he even welcome here? There was only one way to find out. He stepped from the woods and walked around the pool, walking slowly so she could hear him coming if she was listening. He got in line with a window near where he could hear her and spoke quietly.

"Jessica. I am here."

She heard his voice and wiped her eyes quickly, knowing the evidence of her crying would still be seen. Sniffling, she stood and kept her back to him as she composed herself again. Kiara...was dead. Knowing that killed her, knowing Bill was on the brink of breaking down since he lost his abilities, now to learn of this...Then earlier with Quinn...it was all just too much, she was damaged, she was...broken.

"I'm sorry, James. I don't know what else I can say. I'm sorry okay? I'm not...good for you." It pained her to say those words, but it was true. All she did was hurt those she loved, causing pain.

He heard her words faintly through the door.
""I'm sorry, James. I don't know what else I can say. I'm sorry okay? I'm not...good for you.""

Hearing the pain in her voice, he spoke from his heart, remembering something he once heard.

"Jessica, There is no intensity of love or feeling that does not involve the risk of crippling hurt. It is a duty to take this risk, to love and feel without fear or reserve. One that I will gladly shoulder and stand by you through. Don't shut me out. I am here for you, no matter the results.”

He walked slowly to the door and waited, hoping that his instincts were serving him tonight.

She tried to fight back the tears, but with everything going on it was nearly impossible. His words were comforting, but yet it didn't help all the guilt and pain she felt. If only he understood, if only he felt what she felt and even then, even then he may still not get it.

"I--" She started to speak but her words failed her. She slowly turned to face him, but kept her head down for a few silent moments before looking up to see him standing by the door.

"I know you saw...I can't...I don't know--" Again, what was she supposed to say?

He smiled a patient smile and stepped to the doorway.

"Will you invite me in, Jessica? I'd like to talk with you about things but it would be easier if we could sit somewhere and talk."

She looked up to meet his eyes and remembered he didn't know. "Oh, it's my home. I own it. No invitation needed." Wiping at her eyes once more, she grimaced at the blood on her hands and realized she must look like a mess. She moved behind the bar and grabbed a napkin, wetting it under the cool water and wiping her face. "I'm such a mess. Just..." She blew out a breath and turned to look at him.

Lowering her head after a moment, she moved around the bar and up to him, standing closer to him. "Let's talk."

He smiled softly at her explanation.

"It is fine that it is your home, Jessica. Some courtesies can still be observed."

He stepped inside the house, shutting the door and following her into the common room. He waited quietly for her to do what she needed to, then sat down and smiled at her.

"Jessica, before we begin I want you to understand something. I have feelings for you. I do not yet know how far those go, but I am also understanding that you and he had a history, and an unresolved one."

He smiled and waited for her to speak.

She led the way to the common room where her sofa was and took a seat, he sat next to her. She listened to what he had to say as she looked down at her hands and picked at her nails.

"I have feelings for you. I do not yet know how far those go, but I am also understanding that you and he had a history, and an unresolved one."

She looked up at that and smiled softly, deep down she reciprocated those feelings but still feared saying it. Many things held her back. One big reason? Quinn. And James was right, they had history and it was still unresolved.

"I don't...I really don't know where to go from here." She placed her hand on his and squeezed. "I...like you too, I have feelings for you but there is all this...all these changes going on. All this death, all this...confusion? I just...I can't hurt you too and I don't see myself doing anything but hurting you right now."

She moved her hand and turned her head. "I don't know why I kissed him. Truthfully, I wanted to slap him. But I---it was just--" Her words trailed off.

He held a finger to her lips, smiling. Then he walked to the bar, getting a damp cloth and dabbing her cheek to get a spot she missed. He set the cloth back on the bar and looked in her eyes.

"Then it is simple, Jessica. We take things slowly. You are dealing with a lot right now. We both are. Those moments in the sun will be treasured memories but it was gone all too soon and the loss is a painful cut. We take things slow and simple until things calm down. I am fine with friends for now. When you are ready, we can think about talking about more. Now, why don't we start by talking about your friend a bit more, and why you are still so confused about him. That and why you were crying when I got here. From the tears on the newspaper, I am guessing it had something to do with it."

She nodded. Slow was good, slow was what she needed. Time, in time things would get better...right? Maybe one day Andy could forgive her for killing his three daughters, maybe one day she and Quinn could get passed this...maybe one day, she could be happy and with someone who was meant for her, no obstacle, nothing separating them.

Was it too much to ask? Maybe.

She looked down at her hands in her lap and blew out a breath. "My friend...well, I thought of her as one. She was Bill's...fiance. Also Quinn's ex in a round about way." She smiled at that and looked up to meet his soft brown eyes. "She's dead...and now I have to break it to Bill. You saw the state he was in, how he would take this..this would devastate him."

She closed her eyes and swallowed hard. "As for...him...I...I don't know. I'm so angry with him, he just up and left. We were engaged, we had plans...he left me when I needed him most. I didn't think he'd ever come back, I thought he was dead...and then you....I met you and...." She smiled softly but it quickly faded. "You seemed to be everything I needed...but I often thought of him and I hated it."

James dropped his eyes to the floor as his smile faded.

"So in such a short time, you have lost two friends, both unexpectedly. That is hard to deal with on it's own. Now on top of that, a third one, one your were very close with but one that hurt you comes back from the dead. I am beginning to understand your confusion. It has been a long time since Evie died, and I still think of her on occasion. She was my sister, the only family I had left. I know it is not the same, but I do understand the pain of loss, Jessica."

He pulled out a faded and tattered photo from his pocket and handed it to her.

"This is why I was gone for a bit. It was in a hidden place. It is the only picture I still have of her so I am kind of protective of it."

He smiled and looked at her again.

"Seeing you in the compound, seeing how much human emotion you still retained. It gave me hope for myself. Like maybe I could hold onto my own a bit longer, and even had reason to."

Looking down at her hands she gave a small nod, then turned her head to look at him. "It sucks. All of it. The pain sometimes just is...almost unbearable. It just keeps happening...so many people dying..so much death. I knew that was something I'd have to face...watching everyone I'd ever known die. But I expected it to be because they were old, not because they were killed..."

She looked down at the photo he held in his hands and gently took it, the girl in the photo had a bright smile and she was so pretty. It reminded her of Eden a little.

"I had a sister too, she's younger than I am. Still alive, I think..." The thought of Eden being dead made her hurt more, but she pushed that aside. Looking back up at him as he spoke, she felt so many things, good and bad.

"Seeing you in the compound, seeing how much human emotion you still retained. It gave me hope for myself. Like maybe I could hold onto my own a bit longer, and even had reason to."

"I had gave up. I thought...well, I thought I deserved to die. I..." She looked down at her hands. "I killed three fairy girls, innocent girls." Looking back at him, she knew that would show just how much of a monster she was. "I couldn't help myself, and I couldn't stop or change it. You showed me a kindness I'd never had from another vampire."

"Yes, Jessica. I understand how you felt. Fairy blood is a hard thing to face, especially if you are not prepared for it. The scent alone will drive most vampires into a frenzy, and you were surrounded by three of them. Be glad it was simply someone you had met and not your own blood."

He felt a blood tear fall as he took the picture back and returned it to his pocket. He dropped his eyes again as he spoke.

"Taking a life when you do not mean to is never going to be an easy thing, Jessica. Even when you want to, it haunts you."

She met his eyes and brought her brows together as he spoke. "Be glad it was simply someone you had met and not your own blood." It was as if he were remembering something painful and she watched a blood tear fall from his eye. He took the picture and placed it back in his pocket, dropping his eyes from hers.

"Taking a life when you do not mean to is never going to be an easy thing, Jessica. Even when you want to, it haunts you."

She realized and read between the lines. "Oh...James...I--I'm so sorry." She was only assuming but...the way he spoke, he killed his own sister Evie. She moved her body to face him, kneeling before him as she placed a hand on his arm, and her other on the side of his face.

"I don't know what to say...I really suck at these things."

He reached out, lifting her up again. He wiped away the tear, leaving a streak on his cheek and forced a smile.

"Jessica, I only meant to show you that you are not alone. If you would like it, you never have to be alone again. I am here for you, and I have nowhere else to be. We really do have all the time in the world so there is no need to rush. You know I care for you, and I think I know how you feel. That is more than enough for now."

He had been the one to suggest being friends, but he felt himself moving before he realized it. He lifted her to her feet and kissed her softly. He let the kiss linger, gentle and patient, letting her decide when it should end.

"I understand I just---" Her words were cut off with his lips pressed softly to hers. It was so...gentle, so...nice. Her eyes closed and her hands moved to his face as she kissed him back. She pulled back to look into his eyes and found herself leaning forward to kiss him again, her lips parting slightly as she felt her breath hitch in her throat. Placing her hands on his shoulders to steady herself, feeling like she'd fall any moment if she didn't. Her lips lingered there as her kiss deepened and she pulled back realizing what she was doing.

"I'm--I'm sorry...."

"I'm--I'm sorry...."


James smiled and looked in her eyes then spoke with dripping sarcasm.

"Yea...I hated that."

He leaned in, kissing her again softly, taking his time as he let his hands fall to her hips, never taking his eyes from hers.

She smiled and looked down then back up to him and he kissed her again. This time it was hard to resist or pull away, instead she cupped the back of his neck and kissed him back. His hands fell to her hips and she felt herself getting aroused but couldn't stop kissing him. Her eyes remained open as she kissed him, which was different.

She smiled against his lips and reluctantly pulled back from him. "I...really like kissing you. More than I should probably." She admitted and her eyes went to his neck as the memories of their love making came back to her and she cleared her throat, finding it hot in the room.

James could tell that they were both getting far more excited than they should allow for now. They had agreed to slow things down. He pulled back, smiling.

"I know what you mean, and that is why we should stop. We are both a bit emotional right now and that is not the way to do things. Since this is your home, I will go back to your father's estate for the day. Someone should let him know where you are so he does not worry. He really does seem to care for you. Even a bit more than most makers and their progeny. Almost like he was actually your father."

He kissed her one more time, this one brief, and backed away. Smiling at her, he opened the door.

"I will be back after sunset so we can continue talking. I promise."

James knew what would happen if he stayed so he waited for her to turn away and pulled the door shut. He ran at vampire speed back to the Mansion and found a place to bed down for the day. He left word with the guards for Bill that Jessica was at her own home and pulled the cover over himself. He could already feel the sunrise coming and in his mind he could still see the colors.