Deja Vu or Wishful Thinking?

The dreams had continued...Luna with a swollen belly pregnant for him and their peanut. A happy family they made, a tragedy of his dream. Their peanut had died...but how and why he was uncertain. The dream always ended the same..and it pushed he and Luna apart. There was an empty place in his heart and he longed for her, missed her. Then Nicole came into his life and it all changed. The smell of his scent, the meaning behind it....He hadn't told her of the dreams he had been having for fear of upsetting her. It wasn't Luna who was carrying his child...but Nicole. Running a hand through his hair, he exhaled and turned to go inside to see if she was ready to go. Walking in on a conversation she was having on the phone with her mother, who still didn't know she was pregnant.

He leaned against the counter and waited for her to end the call. Today was her first prenatal appointment...the dreams creeping back to his subconscious as he tried to focus on the present.

"Yes, mama, I'm fine. I'm just going to the doctor for a checkup. I'll call you when I get back. I really gotta go."

She sighed and looked over at Sam while rolling her eyes. Leave it to her mama to freak out over the mention of a doctor visit.

"Mhm. Yes. YES! Mama, jeez, I will call as soon as I get out. Stop freakin' out! Love you, too. Bye!"

She hung up quickly and put her phone in her pocket as she turned to Sam. They were going for her first appointment, and she was insanely nervous. She had all intentions of telling her mom about the baby as soon as she could, but Sam had convinced her to wait a little bit longer to make sure everything was fine, so that's what she was going to do.

"You ready to go?"

He seemed to be day dreaming and blinked rapidly after she asked her question the second time. -Yeah, yeah sorry.- He smiled and pushed off of the counter, turning to the door to open it, stepping aside for her to exit first. It felt like he'd done this before...of course he had, in his dreams.

He started the engine and began to drive them to the doctor, his thoughts going a million miles a minute. He was nervous, anxious, and...scared. Could he really do this? In the world like it was today? He drove in silence, his thoughts consuming him.

When they pulled in, he looked over at her and smiled softly. -Are you ready for this?-

"Ready as I'll ever be."

She still couldn't believe she was going to be a mom, and couldn't believe that Sam was going to be the father of her kid. She hadn't known him long at all, but at the rate things were going they were starting to fall into an easy routine. Sam was nice; he was really nice and he always treated her like a lady, especially since the pregnancy was progressing. She liked to think that they would do okay, but it still worried her.

Look over at him, she reached out her hand and grabbed his while smiling.

"Are you ready for this? You barely know me, and you seem really nervous."

He chuckled nervously and shook his head. -No, I'm ready as I can be...it's a change is all. I guess every man goes through this. Sorry I guess I've just been...distracted. Can you forgive me?-

He squeezed her hand and brought it up to his lips as he kissed the back of her hand in effort to reassure her that he was still on board for this. -I promised you I would not leave your side and I won't...no need to worry about that okay?-

He looked towards the building and smiled. -We should get you inside before we miss the appointment-

She smiled at him as he kissed her hand, loving the fact that he was such a gentleman, and the fact that he was still on board for them having the baby. That he wasn't just going to get her pregnant and leave her.

"Thank you for not being like most guys. I'm young and all. Most guys would have run. But not you. You're a good man, Sam Merlotte."

She squeezed his hand and let go before climbing out of the Jeep and going inside. She signed in and almost immediately they called her back.

"I'll be back in a few, Daddy-O."

She laughed and followed the nurse back to the room. They went over a couple of simple questions; when was her last period? How many partners had she had? Did she have any STDs? On and on and on, until finally they came to the fun part.

I need you to strip off your underwear and your jeans, sock and shoes and then call me when you're done. Cover with this. Okay?

She nodded and did as she was instructed, then called for the nurse to come back. She grabbed what looked like some sort of sex toy, snapped a condom on it and then spread lube all over. Nicole's eyes went wide and she licked her lips nervously; what the hell was she about to do?

I know you're nervous, but I promise you that everything is fine.

She then went on to explain the procedure before turning on a screen and slipping the probe into position. Nicole's mouth went wide, her eyes doing the same, and then tears ran down her cheeks. There... It sounded like a tiny fluttering, but it was strong. Her baby....

Their baby.

He watched her get up and walk to the back, a nervous smile on his lips that matched hers. Assuming he was to stay here, he picked up a baby magazine and began to flip through it. The articles, the pictures, nothing was really catching his focus. He tossed it back on the table next to him and ran both hands up and down his face. Sighing, he stood and began to pace the room looking at the different pictures on the wall and so many baby things. The office was pretty empty besides him and the staff.

Would their baby be okay? Was it a healthy pregnancy? Could she hear the heart beat? So many questions reeling in his mind as he paced and felt like he needed a cigarette and one of Lafayette's happy pills to calm his nerves.

"Mr. Merlotte?" He heard a voice ask as he spun around and nodded.

-Yes, that's me. Something wrong with Nicole? The baby?-

She smiled sweetly and shook her head. "Are you the father?" He swallowed at her question. No one had asked him out loud and he cleared his throat just giving a nod after hesitation. "Would you like to come back there? Fathers are welcome." He didn't know what to say. Should he go back there? Should he invade on her privacy? Would she want him back there? He swallowed hard and nodded slowly.

-Y..yes? If I can...I mean if it's alright?- She chuckled at his nerves and nodded her head to the side as she turned to lead him down the hall. He followed and rubbed his palms against his jeans. He was sweating like a fool. She opened a door and he heard the loud sounds of a thump..thump..thump...thump..thump..thump. It was fast. He smiled and stepped in, immediately looking at the monitor where a small circular thing was floating on the screen. He turned to see Nicole on the bed, a smile on her face with tears running down her cheeks. Going to her side, he took her hand. -I'll leave if you want me to. Are you okay?-

"Please stay."

Her voice was quiet as she grabbed his hand and smiled at him through her tears.

"Do you see it? Our baby? Listen...."

She couldn't believe it; there was the baby they had created. It hadn't been born out of love, but out of passion and need. If there was none thing she knew, though, was that this child would never be unloved. She gripped Sam's hand tighter and brought it to her stomach, still grinning like crazy.

"It looks like a peanut. Our peanut!"

She laughed again and leaned her head back against the pillow before her eyes turned back to the screen, not noticing the way that Sam stopped breathing and stared at her when she said 'peanut'.

He smiled and nodded that he would stay. Listening to the heart beat and seeing it content and happy in the confines of her womb, his smile grew and his heart seemed to beat faster. They made this...together. It was a part of them. This baby would have parts of him, parts of her...

Her words caused him to freeze, his heart dropped into his stomach and he just stared at her. Was she joking? Trying to be funny? He released her hand and stepped back, he felt anger and that was unexpected. -No, no...don't...don't call it that!- His voice rose an octave as he swallowed at the lump that wouldn't go down. His legs felt like they would give out, the nurse looked scared at his reaction and he felt like he was sweating. -I'll...I'll be out side.- He didn't wait for an answer as he darted from the room, pushing and nothing happening. Finally out of frustration, he pulled at the knob and left the room. Finding himself in the parking lot, breathing deeply the afternoon air he welcomed to his lungs. Tears stung his eyes, his heart still didn't feel like it was beating...he placed his hands on the jeep and looked down.

She stopped and blinked as he all but screamed at her and stomped out of the room. What had gotten into him? She couldn't call the baby Peanut? What the hell?

"I.... Are we done? I need to go..."

Her voice trailed off as she looked at the door and the nurse nodded before hurriedly finishing up, printing off a couple of pictures and sending her on her way. Walking slowly out of the room, her heart thumping as quickly as the babies had been as she walked from the office to the Jeep. Did she go to him? Leave him alone?

Unsure of how to react, she hung her head and walked away from the Jeep and towards the picnic area out in the front of the doctors office. That hadn't gone nearly as well as she had planned.

He considered his actions and knew he had been out of line. But how to explain it...how to tell her? His heart was heavy as Luna still invaded his dreams. Blowing out a hard breath, he looked up and saw her sitting on the picnic bench across from the parking lot where he stood. He looked back down and cursed himself. He gathered himself and began to walk closer to where she sat, his hands dug into his pockets.

-Nicole...let me explain...I'm sorry I yelled at you. I'm so sorry I...I reacted that way I just...you have to understand....it's not...it's not you.-

This...was going no where. He moved in front of her and slowly pulled his hands out his pockets and gently placed them on hers. -Nicole, I'm sorry. I really am sorry.-

She fought against jerking away, not wanting to even acknowledge that he had tainted what had started out to be the best day of her life. Her baby had a healthy heartbeat, was strong, was healthy. And Sam had ruined it by screaming at her.

"Why? Why would you do that?"

She shook her head and pulled her hands away from his so she could wipe the tears from her cheeks. He had ruined this entire day. She sighed and stood from where she stood, then started walking towards the Jeep.

"Let's just... go."

He had upset her. -I...- Before he could finish answering her, she stood and began to walk towards the jeep. He sighed and shook his head at his own foolishness. Surely she wouldn't understand what caused him to yell at her, and really he didn't mean to. -Damn it- He cursed under his breath and knew he had to explain it to her sooner or later. Fishing the keys from his pocket, he followed her and tried to think about how to make this right. He had already screwed up probably a happy day for her and now she was upset and crying. She was silent and he chose to remain silent until he could figure out how to make it up to her. Way to go Sam Merlotte.