Looking Fate in the eye...

As the reality truly hit him, Quinn sank to his knees in the darkness of the cave. He could feel the tears falling in the dark, but did not care. He knew that the vision was in his own mind, but he also knew what had been said was truth. It was becoming harder and harder to make the change. In Oklahoma, he had to consciously think about it to make it happen. He knew that at least some of the anger he felt grew from the fear of what was happening. Knowing how did not help matters since he could do nothing to stop it. He lifted his head in the darkness and spoke softly...

"Dico egrediebatur a aevo
Agmen vis fati caput
Mater, filia, soror, amice
Regens spiritum meum sæculórum
Iam in hoc sacro tempore ad colligendas
Et auxilium me invenire locum meum iustum captum
Cloie clamavi ad te
Vestra manuduci volo."

I call forth from space and time
The guiding force of Destiny's line
Mother, daugther, sister, friend
My guiding spirit without end
To gather now in this sacred space
And help me find my rightful place
Cloie I call to thee
Your guiding hand I would see.

*She was sitting in on the council Zeus called her to, she was his "reader". She was the only one who could truly and easily read the minds of the Olympians without fail. Leaning over to the God King, she laid a small hand on his arm the minute she heard Quinn's voice*

"Papa, I am being summoned and its one I cannot ignore. May I take my leave?" Her tone was low, sweet. Zeus nodded and smiled at her, waving her off and between one heartbeat and the next, she was gone from the golden splendor of Olympus to the darkness of a vast cave, shimmering into corporeal form before John. She glanced around, wrinkling up her nose at this place and inwardly quieted her demonkyn who thrived on such things.

"My Lord Tiger?"

"My Lord Tiger?"

Her gentle voice in this place of darkness snapped open his eyes as they fell on her gentle face. He could not help but try to smile seeing her again.

"My gratitude for consenting to come, My Fate. I find I need your guidance once again. I have had certain truths revealed to me in this place that cause me great concern. Is there no way to change the dark destiny that lies at the end of my journey? Must it be so?"

*small hands settled on his broad shoulders, her face wreathed in gentle light*

"Are you so sure its dark?"

*the cave pulsed with a burst of primal energy, cascades of light sparking around them in violet pulses for a few moments*

"Happiness can be found in the darkest places if one only remembers to turn on a light."

Then it was dark once more and her tender mien changed slightly, tempered by seriousness. "There is a fine line between fate and free will, John. I've told you this. You can change your stars....but only so much. Destiny wins every time, darling."

He looked up to her violet eyes and tried to smile.

"I'm afraid my darkness had driven my light away from me. I was concerned for her safety and in my rashness, I walked away when she needed me. I do not know if she can ever understand how painful it was to do."

His eyes lowered to the ground.

"Your faith in me honors me, Cloie, but I am not sure I am worthy of it. By destiny's hand, your Lord Tiger is soon to lose his namesake..."

*she walked around the dark, dank area as he talked, a glowing flicker of white and violet. She finally stopped and regarded him a long moment as his voice, full of pain and remorse tapered off*

"Sometimes, the only way to find ourselves is to become...lost. But then again, not all who wander ARE lost."

*Holding his gaze, she offered a small smile, one finger consciously stroking the thinly puckered scar on her left cheek*

"And then sometimes the darkness can be our friend and reveal to us what the light blinds us to."

*She knew she was being vague, but as in so many other things, she could not reveal or tamper. She was allowed to guide, give advice but no outright answers could ever be given. She wouldn't alter HIS destiny most assuredly.*

"And I think you need to give Jessica more credit, agriato." She used the term affectionately, a word not known by many....it meant *brother of the heart* "She is no stranger to the same impulses that drive you. And neither is she a fragile doll. The girl is a warrior. As are you. Seems to be perhaps you should stop fighting yourself so much, however..." A secret grin tugged her lips then was gone and she spread her hands wide in supplication.

"John, you are favored by me for many reasons. Your ability to always find what was before and make it work for you has never ceased to amaze me. You are the most human of the creatures I know and it's always been your saving grace. I sense much doubt in you though right now. Clear your mind, your heart, your conscience. Listen to your spirit."

He stood and walked to her, looking to her eyes and speaking softly...

"It is hard, sweet Cloie, to listen to your spirit when it speaks only in riddles and half answers. You may be right about Jessica's strength, but how can I go back when I left her there? I have so many wrongs in my past to atone for. I do not even know where to begin..."

"You begin...at the beginning. Every sinner has future and every saint has a past, yes? And you just...take that first step back. Back to her. It may be a rough road but one thing I've always known about you, John Quinn, is that you are, nor have you ever been, a quitter."

She took him in, his broad shoulders, warrior's shoulders. The set of his darkly handsome face even covered with grizzly whiskers. Those eyes of his, just a shade or two darker than her own lavender. John would be at home in any place in time. He was ageless and his soul was timeless. In more ways than one.

"And only the climb matters, my Lord Tiger. Not the fall, not the view...just the climb. And John?" For a moment her sweet tone dipped low, almost demonic and husky. "I've lived a lot longer than you. My words can strengthen, destroy, set in motion and define. But the hardest words are the ones never spoken. Don't live like that. Don't be afraid of not being forgiven. Be afraid to not have the courage to say "I'm sorry." Do that and do it with all you heart. The rest is up them."

"Begin at the beginning. You are right. I must make things right in my past as well as my future. Now that I know what is in store, that task is more important than ever..."

He circled his arms around her waist and smiled into her eyes, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"Sweet Cloie, thank you for telling me what I knew before. Thank you for coming when I needed you."

He let her go and stepped back, a look of determination on his face.

"I know now the path before me. Wish me luck in India. I have to start somewhere and it might as well be where this trip really started. I have a lot to do. I've been very out of touch but the present will have to wait until I am ready. I must go to the past first and redeem myself with Grace and her brother, and move on from there..."

*she smiled sweetly, a flash of her own tiny, curved fangs in the dim cave and held out a small hand. The air kicked up with a gentle breeze, the smell of heather and something darker enmeshed within. A thrust of energy and then a wave of light circled her fingers and suddenly within her palm lay a silvered phoenix pendant, the eyes the same color as hers. She handed it to him*

"I will always be there when you call for me, John. Always. Fortune and Fate favor the bold"

*she gave a cheeky grin and nodded at the necklace*

"It will only work once, understand. Just the smallest portion of my power reside within. And I don't mean the ones that are fused in light." For a moment her eyes shifted, bleeding to silver then white then back to purple. "My primal power. If you feel the need for it, to protect yourself or..someone you love against harm that may come your way. If you're trapped or injured. Use it. But it'll only work once as I said so be mindful of what you want it for." She paused and held his dark gaze again, briefly touching his mind, reading the question there. "And no, it doesn't work like the cluviel dor. The Fae are powerful, indeed. But I am something else altogether. All you must needs do is command it."

*Her image began to waver as she slowly dissolved. "I wish you much luck, John. But you never really need luck when you have courage..."And then she was gone but the lyrical sigh on her Atlantean accent lingered.

"I don't trust just anyone with my primality, John. So remember that when you grapple with doubt again. I....trust you...."

As the light faded, his head was clear. He knew what he had to do. He moved to the water's edge and waited for the tide to go back out. It was time to get started. He held Cloie's gift in his hand and could feel it wash over him with energy. His mind formed an image, and it seemed to connect with him as he waited, pondering the path he must now take.