Wise Words

Drumming his finger along the edge of his desk Bill could already feel the lack of blood in his system. For an elder vampire Bill should have not been feeling this much hunger. But before Bill did not have anything to worry about. Blood was always available when he needed it. He had plenty of donors to choose from but now with the risk of Hep V. Bill could not take the chance that one of his donors were infected. He could not take that chance with Jessica's life. He needed to protect what family he had left. He needed to protect Jessica.

But right now he could barely look after himself. Never mind all those whom relied on him. And he did not exactly have the best track record of taking care those who looked to him for protection. He had let go of the one person who truly knew who he was. Kiara. Slumping in his chair Bill let out a heart filled sigh. He needed help. Bill could not do this on his own.

"Ugh. Clo, tell me again, why do you pick pets that do nothing but brood, brood, brood?"

Glancing up from the Reflection Pool, the baby Fate arched a delicately pale brow, the shimmering threads that wrapped around her fingers pulsing with variegated color. Each beat in time to her own heart; when she held the skeins …she WAS part of the world, feeling as her charges felt. Her sister, Atropos, the Death Fate, was rolling her light, sea-foam green eyes and pointing directly into the glowing liquid; the Ether that showed them what they willed. Leaning over, the Goddess peered closely as the milky liquid swirled and parted to show what Atty had been looking at.

She smiled gently seeing Bill Compton and gave her sister a shrug. "One, he is not my pet. He is my friend. But more than that, he is one of my kardiá polemistí̱es. This you know."

Atty groaned. "Heart warrior or not, Adelphi, he bugs me. Him and that other orphan of yours, the Tiger. All they do is brood and ponder. C'mon, Clo. Let me snip their threads for good? Puhhhleaassee?"

Laughing at her sister, she rose up, singing softly to her strands, watching as they unfurled and slipped off her arm and fingers, back into the Pool. Moving closer to Atty and taking another look at Bill's image; feeling his anxiety and inner pain like it was her own, she murmured. "I think I'll go visit him."

"Why? He didn't summon you."

"He doesn't need to. I go as a friend, not as a Goddess."

Rubbing her head, Lady Death waved her baby sister away. "First Lacy and her abnormal obsessions and now you with your ….whatever they are. "

Blowing her grumpy sister a kiss, Cloie vanished from Mount Olympus and directly into Bill's home. Not wanting to startle him, she spoke softly as her form materialized into his line sight.

"Hello, William."

Pinching the bridge of his nose as his eyes remained closed as he tried to silently work out a solution to all of his problems. Everything seemed to be getting on top of him and he was struggling to live through each night. With no one to stand by his side as the one vampire he believed he could have trust was dead. His vampire sheriff's attacked and dead, Sookie in the arms of another man. His youngest progeny dead at his own hands because he was too wrapped up in his own world to see what was really going on around him. He had allowed himself to become distracted from his main goal. With Lilith no longer able to guide him he could not rely on anyone, not even himself any more. He was weak. Worthless.

With constant calls from the press requesting another interview and more vampire deaths reported within the surrounding states. It was all becoming too much for him to bare, all of his allies either dead or against him. No Vampire Authority either to turn to and now with the human government going against vampires. He had put off several calls from the President of the United States, Barak Obama who was once a loyal vampire equal rights supporter now rallied humans against vampires. His main campaign to make sure that he got another term in presidency.

What could Bill do?

Lowering his hand back down to the edge of his desk he heard a voice, a soft angelic voice that sent shivers through his entire body.

".....Clotho......" he whispered softly.

Bill instantly stood up from his chair and swiftly moved around his desk and bent down on one knee and lowered his head in respect.

"M'lady.....You honour me with your presence" he spoke keeping his head lowered and gazed to the ground.

*wrinkling her nose, the petite Goddess laid a soft hand on his shoulder, her laughter the sound of tinkling bells and full of genuine affection."

"William, what have we discussed?  You know how much I hate that whole bowing and kneeling thing."  As she spoke, she wrapped fingers around his arms, pulling him up gently until he towered over her. He looked pale, drawn and his handsome face was heavy with the rigors of his position. It was no easy thing to be vampire. Or a King.

Reaching up, she fondly patted his cheek. "I should have come sooner, it's been a very long while. Forgive me, please. Time passes so very differently where I live. Now, talk to me, William. You look positively hopeless. And that is not a look I care to see on you, akribos. Unburden yourself to me. You know I'll listen without judgment or condemnation."

Bill felt her soft delicate fingers through the material of his suit jacket, it was as though her touch had penetrated through to his cool skin. He slowly stood to his feet and raised his head as he towered above her a few inches. Her mere presence alone had banished away all negative thoughts that had been battling through his mind. An inner war that would soon re-appear soon enough.

"Forgive me....I find myself unworthy of your presence Clotho" he admitted to her.

Bill smirked softly into her soft and tender touch. It that single moment he felt a wave of warmth flood his entire body. His body normally a cold re-animated corpse, but her touch alone made him remember of a time when he was once human. A memory that was fading as he believed himself not worthy to remember back to times when things were easy. 

"....Does it ever get any better? After everything that I have done, will I ever be truly forgiven?" he whispered hoarsely to his Goddess.

"Well, as far as I'm concerned, you are always and completely forgiven, William. But I have a strong suspicion that that's not that the answer you were seeking." She paused, motioning her head to the soft leather sofa and waited until they were sitting to finish. "As always, you carry both your salvation or destruction within. You are your harshest critic."

Now, she studied him carefully, a rueful chuckle falling from her lips. "How different you are from your brethren. Take Eric Northman, for example. That one does as he pleases and cares nothing for how it may affect others. He suffers no guilt, no remorse or if he does, he never shows it. Although, I know things about him most don't. Atty finds him most interesting. I'm not sure if that should frighten him or not. Not always a good thing when Death obsesses on you, right?" Another quick grin. "Most people see that behavior of his as cold, calculating and without mercy, I suppose. But he makes no apologies and he has survived well with that pragmatic nature of his. But, people like you and I?"

She tilted her head, her snowy hair catching the soft lights of his office. "Well, we are built differently. It's never been about just us. We always take the needs of the many over our own, more selfish ones. I'm not saying we're entirely altruistic. But we take all the heartache of this world, and our actions in it, to heart and that is how layer upon layer of guilt slowly builds in our souls. Your destiny was..is…a great one, William. But great doesn't always mean you will find comfort in it. You will be tested. The strongest steel is always forged in the fires of hell. It can make or break you. Its not for anyone to forgive YOU, Bill. YOU need to forgive yourself."

Shining violet eyes held his own. "And I feel constrained to note, you ARE most worthy of my company. And favor. I don't give either lightly."

Bill followed Clotho to sit down on the plush leather couch in his office as he listened carefully to every single word that she spoke. Bill let out a sigh as he tried to believe in her words but he couldn't. He had failed all those around him, he failed to protect his own progeny from a death that could have been prevented. 

"You have so much faith and belief in me when I do not deserve it....How can one be worthy of such graces when I cannot believe in your words myself. Forgive me for being so bold Clotho, but you have on many occasion have saved me from a spiralling madness and have given me another chance to make things right but in the end....Fail" he admitted to her.

Shifting in the seat as he ran both his hands through his hair as he let out another sigh before craning his head around to gaze softly at her.

"Northman always had a way of doing the wrong thing....But in the end he always came out the other end. I took my eyes of the playing field and I have lost those who I can never get back" he ended in a whisper, lowering his eyes "....Is she happy....Brianna?" he asked her sincerely.

She didn't even hesitate, merely nodded. "She is at peace, William. I took her to my Uncle myself and stayed with her as she was judged. She was given two choices and chose to come back…she chose reincarnation. And that is all I can say of it, agriato."

She knew that Bill, like Quinn, knew she was bound to her charge and duty. She rarely confirmed or denied, talked little of Olympus. Truth was, she much preferred the company of even Bon Temps' lowest life forms than most of her own "kin".

"Bill, you are not a failure. The only true failure is to stop trying. You haven't stopped. You're not done. You once told me wisdom was what you were seeking. I told you the path lay before you would be fraught with lessons. You were so firm then. I believed in you. I still do. Now I need YOU to believe in me when I say you are no failure. People who embrace their destiny are NOT failures."

Bill felt a weight lifted from his shoulders as Clotho told him that Brianna was at peace. She would be re-born. Maybe in time he could find her, let her live a life that she should have had in the first place.

"You speak such kinds words and have such faith in me Clotho....But yet this path that I am on leads me down a way that no one can follow. I cannot confide in anyone and those whom I do see what I am and what I do...And they run. They either choose to leave me or I push them away. Is that the price that I have to pay for being who I am?" he quizzed her.

Bill knew that because of what he was he would spend an eternity alone. And there was nothing that he could do to change that.

*She gazed at him for long moments. Whereas Quinn embraced the darkness within him, William still struggled. He'd been human and humans had this extremist attitude when it came to good/bad and light/dark. Very few keened to the gray areas in between. Bill struggled with his morality, not his mortality. He always had. One of the many reasons, she felt a connection to him.

She struggled too…with her own demons. Quite literally.

A thought began to form in her mind. One that would surely piss Atropos or Lachesis off to no end. It wouldn’t best please any of the Olympians. Not one bit. And she wasn't sure Bill himself would agree to it. It would change his life…significantly.

But the moon in her responded to the deep sea in him. It always had. It always would. Something about William Compton intrigued and enchanted her. She knew what was happening in Bon Temps. And what was happening all over the world. She couldn't interfere with that. Ever. Although one snap of her small fingers would obliterate it, there were things that were forbidden to tamper with.

Just as the choice she was about to offer to Bill. However, there were few people in her life that truly understood her…and what she did. And didn't fear her for it.

It would be worth it.

Bill was worth it.

Reaching out, she lay a pale hand atop his own. The coolness of his skin didn't bother her. Not one bit.

"William. When did you feed last?"

For the last several days Bill had been feasting on his own blood to sate the hunger that grew deep inside of him. So far he had managed to keep himself together but there was many opportunities for Bill to loose his grasp on reality and take the life of one of his human guards. Hearing their hearts pump blood around their veins made Beel become very irritant and blood thirsty. He had been unable to supply blood for Jessica, his only main priority at this moment. He did not care for anyone else other than Jessica.

Hearing Clotho's voice he craned his head around to gaze at her hearing her question ".....Close to two weeks. Blood has become impossible to obtain with this disease killing vampires all over the state" he told her honestly "But it is not me who I am concerned about, it is Jessica. She is all that I have left"

She nodded slowly. She was rather fond of the girl herself. One of her charges who embraced what was before her and never ran from destiny. Poor Bill. He'd lost his human family and she knew in deep fear of losing the child of his heart..and blood.

"Do you remember how you felt when you drank Lilith's blood? How powerful? The possibilities that lay before you despite the darkness and thorough wickedness? She was mad, insane. Her blood…the same. William…do you remember how you felt after drinking MY blood? It counteracted hers for a while. Just long enough, yes?" She moved closer, violet eyes huge and serious, a rare thing to see in her. "What…what if I offered you a chance to not worry about your blood source again?"

Bill simply nodded.

He remembered how it felt when Lilith's blood first touched his lips. It felt as though everything was opened to him for the very first time. He could see everything, hear everything, feel absolutely everything. 

"Yes. I remember everything. Sometimes I wished I did not. But I need to remember, I need to know who I was and who I am" he admitted softly to her.

Frowning upon hearing her words, they had him intrigued.

"How is that possible?" he looked on confusingly.

"It's possible if I …if I offer you…myself."

She held up one hand as his eyes grew wide, giving him the sweetest of smiles. "Bill, you know I'm…what I am. What I do. Now, granted, here, in this realm, Earth…vampires are definitely the top of the food chain. But I am no vampire…I am something else entirely.." Her eyes began to glow with swirls of silver and red, the ribbons of color bleeding into the amethyst. "However, my blood is far more potent, divine and….permanent. I am…oh…what do the mortals say? I am an endless well. You could never drain me and I don't weaken like any human would. And you could feed Jessica…as long as you need to without worrying…"

She paused briefly then went on. "I won't lie to you, William. It will bind you to me. When I let you drink my blood before, it was just a taste, a way to stem the influence of Lilith's blood. This…what I am offering is far more…intimate. The more of my blood inside of you….it will open up a channel between us. Far stronger than any you have known. It makes the vampire and progeny connection look weak…."

Bill's eyes grew wide as he tried to let her words sink in, she was offering herself to him. That was not what he was expecting.

"Why would you do this for me? I have nothing to offer in return Clotho" he admitted to her.

What could Bill offer her in return? He had no possession that he could give to her other than his loyalty which she knew she already had.

"Why would you choose to bind yourself to someone like me? You know what I am and what I have done. The last person who put so much trust in me....well it didn't go very well. Why would you want to create that connection?" he quizzed her curiously.

"Because, William. I will always come to your call. I won't grow old or die. I won't weaken. There is not one thing you can ever say or do to make me run. You can't push me away. The fact is that I've done far worse than you ever could. I have beat myself with the same stick you use to hurt yourself. All the things you castigate yourself for, I have done the same."

She took both his hands in her own. "Wouldn't it be nice, William? Nice to have one creature in all the worlds who will never look on you with judgment or criticism? It's lonely…being what we are. You and I. So lonely. Because we feel, so strongly. About everything. And it seperates us…our conscience. Wouldn't it be nice…to not be alone in that? I won't leave you….ever." She squeezed his hands gently.

"You have so much to worry over. So much. So, let me help you…."

Bill lowered his head upon hearing her words letting them fully sink in. He had never heard anyone speak in such a manner about what he was or how he acted. He was not judged for anything that he had done.

"....You had me the moment that I first saw you Clotho" he whispered sweetly.

Raising his eyes to meet her gaze, eyes that had seen so much. A heart that was cloaked in a darkness that they both shared.

"....Tell me what I have to do" he almost pleaded with her.

*Other than John and the one time before with William, she had never shared her blood. For good reasons. It wasn't a bond she liked to make lightly as it was irreversible. Oh, she wasn't worried for herself, but for him. For William. It worked both ways…what she felt, he'd feel at times. She would know if he was threatened or hurt. The link she and Quinn shared was familial, he was the older brother she wished she'd had. Her feelings for Bill were….different. There was simplicity in her connection with John, his nature catered to the demon inside of her and soothed it. Bill, on the the other hand, was the humanity in her…

She was making the right choice. For William and herself. By ingesting her blood, it would also keep him safe from other horrors, like the other Gods. A few of them took great notice of Earth and liked to toy with the ones living on it. Her blood would label him as "hers", just as it did with Quinn.

Slowly, she sat back, pulling the heavy curtain of icy hair aside, baring her slender neck and scooting closer. John had taken it from her wrist but ….some inner instinct had her offering up her throat to Bill. She wouldn't have to drink from him…often. Just when her demonae became surly and hungry which thankfully wasn't much. She heard her heart pounding furiously, this was beyond the mortal intimacy of sex…she was giving part of herself up. To a good man.*

Bill watched her shift on the leather couch towards him baring her neck to him. In that single moment he froze. Like a child unsure of how to proceed next. He didn't know what to do.

".....I will be gentle" he assured her in a husky whisper.

Bill leaned forward raising his hand letting it glide across the crane of her soft flesh. His fangs dropped as he leaned forward letting the tips of his fangs nip across her neck. Hesitating for a moment before he sank his fangs in softly as he was instantly assaulted with the first wave of her blood into his mouth.

*she made a soft sound, a tremor running through her body as his fangs pinched down, lashes fluttering down even. Tiny hands, like loose white birds fluttered and rose, one landing on his shoulder, the other taking root in his thick dark hair, holding him closer. So many of her memories were now his, her childhood racing by, eons spent on Olympus, her frequent trips through space and time simply to escape the reality of her own existence…a thing to be feared. And never loved. Fear or fascination were the two poles of reaction she generally engendered in most…..

While he fed, she carefully delved into his own mind, her ousia and powers pushing into him so they'd have that open link. She'd given her word…all she told him…her binding vow even as she dropped the oaths into the universe. Her unity with Bill would be as different as hers with Quinn as night was to day. Balance, always balance. John held her darkness…but Bill would embrace the light. The one light that could never hurt him…only empower him.*

Soft waves of her heavenly blood trickled into his mouth and slid down his throat like pure silk. Bill had never truly tasted her blood before, but now he could taste everything. Flashes of images passed through his mind in a reel, memories that were not his own. Closing his eyes for a moment as he absorbed everything that he could. As more of her blood trickled down his throat he was flooded with more memories that mixed with his own. His eyes blinded by a light that did not burn his flesh. His body began to shake as he withdrew his fangs and slid from the leather couch to the floor onto his knees.

His eyes flashed to a bright illuminating violet before returning back to normal. His body was on edge, not used to this feeling. He glanced down to his hands as though a clear silk had begun to weave over his flesh. Seconds later for it only to disappear.

"......What's happening....." he stuttered.

*Her powers ebbed and flowed, primal and raw, causing a whirling vortex to shift around the room but not actually affecting either of them. The drapes stirred, papers on his desk scattered and then it died down. Touching the side of her neck, she quickly sealed the tiny pricks his fangs had left and tilted her head to the side. Beautiful….she saw the flash of violet in his dark eyes then it was gone. The more he drank from her, soon enough, the rims of his irises would shift to amethyst on a more permanent basis. She moved gingerly, shifting to the floor to kneel at his side, small, warm hands on each of his cheeks, pulling his face up gently to meet her gaze.

"I am older than Lilith, far far older. I was born in a time when no time was recorded. Someday, William, I will tell you more but right now, all you need know is my blood is pure. Hers was diluted. You've a fraction of my power and potency. Just what your extant abilities are now, we've yet to see but I know you won't abuse them. I trust you, Bill. I always have. You may have taken Lilith's blood but your heart was always yours."

Cocking her head to the side, she saw the meshlike webbing of her energy cover him, sinking into his skin. "So beautiful…" Her voice was soft, even softer her smile. "Now, you have my absolute protection as well as my favor. But I have to warn you, others of your kind will feel it, sense it. The Gods won't dare touch you. But others may. They will sense you're different. And should they harm you, I will know. I give you my word, William Compton, which binds me far more than my blood. You are now part of me, and I of you."

Bill still remained on his knees, his arms supporting his upper body as he was hunched over trying to ride out these new sensations that he had never felt before. It was as though the sun was lingering over his skin but yet it did not burn. His body did not perish and succumb to the sizzling blisters and red raw patches of burning flesh. He could feel no pain. Nothing.

"I can feel it...I can feel it all" he whispered still dazed.

It was like his own blood was being coated in liquid silk, all the blood that he had taken from Lilith disappeared. All the anger that he had been keeping locked up inside of him was gone. He raised his eyes to gaze at Clotho, fragments of her blood seeped through into his eyes blending into his natural colour.


Bill let out a gasp as he listened to Clotho's words as they broke through the haze that he had been locked in.

"She's......She's gone" he whispered.

*grinning at him, wrinkling her nose in affected distaste (she'd never cared for the Blood "Gods"..ha! More like demons but then again, she had no room to speak. Hers was a different beast altogether), she laughed lightly.

"Of course she is. The dark is powerful. Patient. And there are far more times it wins than it loses. Lilith.." She waved her hand airily. "Kept her face turned the moon without realizing how important the warmth of the sun truly is. Probably why she and my sister, Atropos, got along for a while. Yes, she was without equal, busying herself in the affairs of mankind. Dark and decadent, her shadows spread far wide. But in the heart of darkness lies its weakness. One lone candle, one small beam of light is enough to hold it back. That is what saves me, every day. Or I'd be as bad as Lilith was and on a far more disastrous scale." She trailed off, studying him as subtle changes began to take place in his eyes and face. Nothing grand or immediately noticeable. He was still Bill…just…more of.

Gently, she leaned forward and brushed her lips across his pale forehead before sitting back. "I'm not sure exactly…but there may come a time you can be out. In the sun again. We'll see. I certainly have no wish to experiment that just yet." She paused again, holding his gaze. "And Bill? There is something else you need to know. I…I can't see your destiny anymore. I never will again. Neat little trick of my gifts. Anyone I'm close to….I am blinded to what lies before them. But you will never have to fight alone again. Okay? I will always be here."

Bill had slowly began to return to normal, the dazed feeling that cloaked his eyes and made him un-steady in balance. Bill slowly struggled to get his feet with the help of Clotho. The hunger feeling that he had disappeared, he felt as normal as could be. It was as though he was the old Bill once again.

"Lilith took everything from me. Everyone that I cared about and yet when I could no longer see her...I knew that she was still here" he emphasised by placing his hand over his un-beating heart.

Bill listened to her words about possibly being able to go out in the sun, and that she would never be able to see his future again. 

"....So what happens now? How do I make things right? Vampires are dying across the world and there is nothing I can do to help....Is there a way to save them?" he pleaded with her.