He who laughs last

Watching the exchange, Quinn moved quickly. He could see where this was heading. He pulled Jessica to him, letting her bury her face in his chest.

"Let it go, Jessica. Let it go...holding it in will do no good..."

He held her gently, stroking her hair, trying to calm her...

Kiara blinked. Well at least it seemed like Quinn was learning. Strangely, despite everything that should justify her be angry or jealous she wasn't. She was actually glad Quinn seemed to have moved on, even if it was rather quickly. With a roll of her eyes and a soft chuckle she began to step out of the bar. Her shoulder was still aching and she was rather hungry. The firemen were already there dealing with the clean up.

She headed outside and back to her car. Maybe she'd stop by A & W and grab a greasy burger...or 3. Wolves did have big appetites after all. Besides, she didn't want to make Jessica any more uncomfortable by being there.

I felt him pull me into his strong arms and I knew he meant well. "I can't Quinn...I just...I can't." Pulling away from him as I sped to the bathroom before he could hold me there, sinking down against the door and crying. Blood all over my hands and white Merlotte's shirt. My chest hurt so bad, and I couldn't understand anything right now. I couldn't let him watch me cry. I just couldn't.

He watched Kiara walk out the door, admittedly feeling a small pang of guilt after his comment when she arrived...

Looking after Jessica, he sighed. He understood her reasons but he couldn't help but be a bit upset when she pulled away...

After thinking for a minute, he realized part of the problem and moved over to the souvenir stand, grabbing a Merlotte's shirt around the right size, and stuffed a few bills under the till...moving to the door, he set it on a tray nearby and waited. He knew what happened when she cried, and was not going to ruin things by pushing too hard...

"Jessica...I understand...I am here when you are ready to come out..."

I sat against the door as the tears fell freely. Wiping my hands on some tissue as I scowled at the blood everywhere. When I cried it was messy and gross. I heard Quinn on the other side of the door and closed my eyes. Licking my lips as I sniffled and let my head fall back against the door. "Quinn...I'm...I'm fine. Really." I didn't deserve to be treated like he treated me, He was too kind. Maybe I did deserve what Jason said. Every time he was around vampires this happened to him and his sister Sookie. Maybe I wasn't worth saving. I began to question my self worth and it made me cry harder.

Kiara was just about to get in her car when her phone rang. With a sigh she leaned against her car and spoke. It was one of her employees. Orders were coming in left and right since after vegas people knew of her business. She talked him through how to deal with the high volume, before she had to sit on the trunk of her car, typing away furiously on her phone to get as much as she could do on this end done.

After a few minutes, Quinn heard her move away from the door. He grabbed a towel off the service racks and the tshirt, quietly opening the door and slipping inside, pulling it shut behind him. He draped the tshirt over the door handle and moved over to the sink, soaking the corner of the towel.

"Jessica, come here...."

He helped her over to the sink, using the moist part of the towel to help her clean up.
He smiled as he looked into her eyes while he helped her.
He leaned close, whispering in her ear, "You are not alone, Jessica. You never need to be again..."

Looking carefully into her face, he began using the dry end of the towel to dry her smooth skin, running his fingers across her cheek gently...

I stood to grab the tissues, feeling so confused and hurt. Quinn entered and closed the door as I turned to face him, watching as he wet the towel. I didn't move until he asked me to come closer. Hesitantly approaching him as he wiped the blood from my face and was so gentle. My emotions were at a new high, and I was doubting EVERYTHING. I was doubting myself and I was doubting Quinn. I looked into his eyes as he ran his finger across my cheek gently.

"I will though. I know I'm awkward around Jason, but why are you so afraid of Kiara? Am I just the distraction you need?" Before I could stop the words were out and I stepped back, the pain in my chest growing, tears resurfacing.

He continued to help her get herself back together...thinking....

"You don't know...that's right....."

He smiled as he put a few pieces of the puzzle together in his mind...

"She has made a choice to write me off entirely. She sent the few things I had left behind with Vincent, my valet, and ordered him to not even speak when he picked the package up."

He reached over grabbing the fresh shirt, setting it on a clean spot on the counter.

"I am just giving her space and letting her decide how things work. I am trying to do things right...."

He lifted Jessica's chin so he could look at her directly,
"You are so much more to me than a distraction...I am not even sure how to explain how much more..."

I looked up into his eyes. His soft lavender colored eyes. Taking each of my hands and placing them on his and pulled it down. Looking down as I began, "She wants you to go after her. She wants you to start the conversation." I looked back up at him and shook my head. "Don't you get it? If she were over you or hated you she'd have burned your things. But she didn't." Remembering how Sookie had ran from the car that night and how Bill was stubborn and refused to go after her. It was then she started to slip away. "I...I can't....I can't be certain until you talk to her." I couldn't just let him give up without trying. Bill always regretted it and I couldn't let him.

Quinn smiled, nodding.

"I understand, Jessica. I understand..."

He took her face in his hands, caressing her cheek with his thumb as he looked in her eyes.

"For your own peace of mind, I will try..."

I took a deep breath and could hear Kiara outside on her phone. "She's outside. I'll....I'll be in here and change."

I knew what I was risking, but I had to be sure I wasn't just a distraction. I couldn't handle another heartbreak and the feelings I was developing for him scared me actually. I never thought I'd allow myself to be that vulnerable. Not since Jason, not since professing my love to someone just to have it dismissed and it would not happen again. Ever.

Quinn passed her the towel and nodded, smiling to her.

He stepped out into the dining area and looked around for Kiara. He caught her scent coming through the doorway and headed out the door.

"Kiara...I think you and I should talk, if you have a few minutes...."

Kiara lifted her head. She'd been finishing up some orders on her phone when Quinn came. Curious she shrugged and nodded "Yeah sure... whats on your mind?" she asked. She remained seated on the truck of her car, her feet dangling a bit.

"Things ended harshly when we last spoke...and I will admit it was at least partly my fault. I do not know everything that happened, but through overhearing things I have been able to piece some of it together."

He walked closer so he could look at her directly.

"I thought it might be good to clear the air...so to speak..."

She nodded "Alright then. I know I spoke harshly but granted I was dealing with frayed nerves so for that I do apologize Quinn" she said with a kind smile.

Again, despite things, she felt no ill will. It was strange not to feel the usual emotions she demonstrated.

"That may be the case, but as I made clear, I believe you were right. It seems that no matter how much we try, we are not meant to be. I do not wish to cause you more pain. I would however prefer we at least remain friends...if you feel that is possible."

He watched her, trying to pick up any cues she might reveal...

She felt a small sharp sting. Inwardly she could feel the tiny vestige of hope shattering inside her but she hid it all behind a mask of passive happiness. Ironically, by not wanting to cause her more pain, he had just done that.

"Well... I won't go against what you feel is right Quinn. I only want you to be happy" she said, giving him a friendly smile she didn't feel. Quinn had been part of her past, a big part and it was as if that book was destined to end abruptly.

Quinn saw her smile, and took it at face value.

"I would hope you could find happiness. Your ties with Compton are strong, and perhaps he can make you happier than I have. Jessica explained the madness and that it is gone. Knowing that you would be safer with him, I would not interfere with your happiness. I would even wish you well..."

He returned her smile, feeling relief that she understood his perspective and his wish to prevent causing her more pain...

She blinked, her mind taking a whole 3 seconds before she registered what he said. "My...ties?" she asked then sighed. "Oh right...you believe me to be with Bill... I forgot. I would want to be with a vampire after I got raped and drained by one" she said with sarcasm so heavy you'd need a chainsaw to cut through it.

"No Quinn, you're right... I mean I was physically abused so of course I'd want you to just leave and for me to go hop unto the next fang train"she rolled her eyes. Despite speaking with sarcasm she had that eerie, level headed anger that was much scarier than normal anger.

"Any normal man would bolt as soon as a woman tells him she was raped. I mean who'd want to deal with THAT sack of crazy?"

His smile melted away as if hit with a blowtorch.

"I didn't know, Kiara....you never said...."

He was at a loss for words...

"Why didn't you say..."

The question died in his throat as he realized that she had been right. He had not been there for her.

She sighed. "I was going to, but you were too busy leaving me notes instead. I ended up spending the night alone, wondering why no one could be bothered to pardon the pun, throw me a bone" she said. Again that eerie calmness surrounded her.

"But...all thats in the past now Quinn. We can't change what we've done, we can only hope to move on and pick up the pieces left behind" she offered him a smile. "Maybe you should go back to Jessica. I'm sure she's worried of what I'm doing to you out here"

I stood in the bathroom having changed my shirt and finally composed myself. I could hear everything they were saying and when I heard her say what happened to her in Vegas, my heart dropped. He'd left her, not bothering to ask what had caused her to be so angry. Just left. As I slowly exited the bathroom and leaned against the wall in the hallway, I sank down to sit down. Leaning against the wall and pulling my knees to my chest.

He didn't know what happened, he had no idea. Here she was hurting and no one to turn to and I was frolicking with Quinn. I cared for Kiara as she saved my life and Bill's once. I also knew how deeply Bill felt for her, which she didn't. He was too afraid to tell her due to him trying to rip her neck off. Things were so complicated...complicated is what it would always be.

"Kiara, if you had only said. With what you said to me, I thought you wanted me gone. The next time I saw you, you acted as if there was nothing between us, so I accepted that...I moved on...as I believed you had...All we seem to do when we try to be together is cause each other pain. How many times have we tried, Kiara? Every time, it ended badly. I only hope that you can eventually find someone who will treat you as well as you deserve."

He looked toward Merlotte's door, thinking of Jessica. With her vampire ears, she was probably within earshot and that meant she would know everything that had been said.

"I am not going to lie to you, Jessica does make me happy. I have a connection to her I don't yet understand, but just being around her improves my mood. I am going to do my best not to screw it up, but I am in new territory with this. I just hope that you can find happiness..."

He tried for a gentle smile, but he was not sure how well it worked...

"I know that it may be hard, but I would like to ask you one favor..."

He looked her directly in the eyes...

"I am asking you to forgive me...for the pain I have caused...for the anger I made you feel...and the sadness that both brought about...I really do wish to at least be civil, if not friends..."

She smiled softly and touched his cheek. "Quinn...I already forgave you. Go in peace.. and find the happiness that neither of us has been able to achieve" she said softly.

"I was merely naive. Relying on others has never been my style. I'm a lone wolf, and it seems fate has declared I remain as such. Go. Be with Jessica and make her happy ok? she's a sweet girl and could use a guy like you"

She hopped off the trunk of her car, brushing down her pants with her hands. "If you need anything, never hesitate to ask alright?"