Finding a new path together

He looked in her eyes. He had always been able to read her like a book...

"I'm glad you're better."

"Jessica....you know we can talk about anything. What is troubling you?"

"I'm going to confront him...I'm going to ask him about it, I have to do it alone and you can't stop me. But...if he is crazy, if he has lost it...I want you to know I love you. I always have." I looked down after blurting it out and knowing he'd be determined to come with me or have a guard with me but this was something I needed to do alone.

"Jessica...you are speaking in riddles...or my mind is more fried than I thought."

I smiled and realized he didn't know, didn't remember. "Bill...I'm confronting him about the vial, about glamouring Kiara. I watched the video...don't you remember?"

"I told you about it...but that is all I knew. I did not even know if you bothered to see them. At the point I told you, I would not have blamed you for walking away...not after..."

He let go of her hand and looked into the woods.

"..what I did to you...and almost did..."

I watched him walk away from me, the guilt riding up again and interfering. I folded my arms across my chest and sighed.

"Quinn how long are we going to play the guilt game? I...I feel like it's my fault...you think it's yours. We both lost control of the situation, neither of us planned for it. Now...it's if we can move past it."

I looked up and saw his back still to me. "Can we?"

"Can we?"

"I want to move past it as well, but there is more you have to know before we really can. There is a very good reason you do not need to feel any guilt for what happened to me..."

I knew, I already knew he'd been using probably before we met but it didn't change my guilt. I also didn't know if I should tell him I knew so I just looked at him and waited for him to tell me himself.

"Why is that?"

"Why is that?"

"I think Vincent already figured this out. I have had this issue for quite a long time. Almost a decade. You have no reason to feel guilt. I thought I beat it in the past...it is why I have always been adamant about not drinking vampire blood. I thought I beat it, but I was deceiving myself."

He looked down at the ground.

"I was weak. I thought that I had overcome it. When you helped me in the hospital, I was afraid. I didn't know what would happen if I took that much V. I didn't want to....revisit my past. When it helped and I did not feel the hunger, I thought it was ok..I thought maybe because you were so young a vampire...perhaps the addiction wouldn't take hold again...I was wrong...and my weakness almost killed you. I needed to have that out in the open, Jessica. I do not want to keep secrets from you. I promise you, on my love for you, I am not going back to that world...that half-life...that...dark place."

Hearing him explain everything to me and tell me the truth, I knew it cost him a lot...to admit the weakness he had. Quinn was not a weak man and this did not define his weakness. Everyone screwed up, even me. I stepped closer to him and reached up to cup the side of his face as I looked into his eyes.

"You're not weak, you had a moment of weakness, yes....but you will never be weak in my eyes John Quinn. The darkness you had to overcome not to hurt me...you have to give yourself some credit. You're stronger than you think."

I pressed a soft kiss on his lips and stepped back, giving him a smile.

Quinn's eyes were closed as he spoke, so he did not see her approach. He felt her lips on his own, sending a spark through his mind, reminding him of the times they had shared.

"You are the one who gives me that strength, Koibito. Without your strength, I would not still be here."

He stepped close to her, pulling her tight against him, lifting her chin to place a gentle kiss on her lips.

I pushed myself away from him and took a very unneeded breath trying to regain my barrings. I wanted him...no I needed him but with his condition and all we'd been through lately, I couldn't chance it. I looked up into his eyes and smiled.

"And I'll always be here for you."

I took his hand again and turned to start walking again, trying to get my mind free of the things I wanted to do to him. Trying not to think of that searing kiss he'd planted on me when he was aggressive that night. He was always so gentle with me, like I was a delicate flower. Kiara had said she didn't mean it when she said I didn't ignite his passion, but somehow I still wondered. My free hand came up to touch my lips as I thought about that kiss and felt my stomach clench in memory.

"And I'll always be here for you."

He could tell from her scent that she wanted far more than a kiss, but she was holding back for some reason. Her hand in his, they walked through the woods. He smelled the rain before it began, and began to laugh as they entered a clearing right as it began to fall.

"A cleansing rain..what better way to symbolize a fresh start?"

As the rain fell over them, he pulled her close, crushing her lips with his own.

I could hear the thunder in the distance but hadn't paid much mind to it, the air seemed to get a bit colder as we continued to walk. A clearing was just ahead of us and I was surprised he stopped just as we entered it. I turned to look at him and he pulled me to him. Hearing him speak of a cleansing rain made me smile before his lips touched mine and the rain began. I started to think of the rainy night that hurt the most but pushed it far back into my mind.

My hair was nearly soaked in minutes and my dress clung to my body, not leaving much to the imagination anymore. I kissed him back with the same intensity he had, placing a hand on his face and pressing my body to his. My emotions overcame me and I pulled back, squinting because of the rain. "Sorry..I'm sorry I got carried away...I--"

"Sorry..I'm sorry I got carried away...I--"

He pulled her close again, looking directly in her eyes.

"Don't you ever say you're sorry for that, Koibito. That is never something to be ashamed of."

He stripped off his shirt and began kissing her again, letting the walking cane fall to the ground, holding her face with both hands.

"Quinn--" My words were cut off by his lips against mine, more aggressive than before. I kissed him back and slightly opened my mouth to allow his tongue in. The electric shock that I felt feeling his bare chest against me, holding my face with both of his hands. My kiss became needy, urgent, desperately seeking solace in his arms.

Nothing really could describe it except for incredible. The rain fell upon us and neither one of us seemed to notice. I wrapped my arms around his chest and gave myself to him, allowing him to take full control.

As they touched and kissed, the world around them seemed to fade into nothing...all there was was them...their love...the touch of each other...the electric kisses...

"My princess....my Jessica...I am yours...."

He reached his arms around her, lifting her from her feet and walking further into the clearing...he stumbled a bit, but kept moving until they reached the center of the clearing. He lowered her to the grass, laying next to her, kissing her tenderly and deeply, simply enjoying the time he was spending with her.

I giggled against his lips when he lifted me and continued to kiss him, even though he stumbled he continued on like the warrior he was. My warrior, my tiger. My back met the grass and I turned on my side to face him as he continued to kiss me tenderly, but still deeply in that special way it felt like his soul touched my own. With vampire speed I was on top of him. I sat up on his hips and moved the wet hair that stuck to my face as I looked down at him squinting slightly as the rain fell upon us.

"Tell me...I need to know something."

I thought about not asking, but I had to hear it from his lips...not hers.

"Do I ignite your passion like she does? Or did..."

Immediately I regretted my question, but continued to search his eyes for the confirmation that I indeed held his heart, and ignited his passion.

"Tell me...I need to know something. Do I ignite your passion like she does? Or did..."


Quinn looked at her confused for a moment, then rolled his eyes...

"Ahh..Kiara being her usual vindictive self eh? I told you before that my preference is for something a bit cooler than a little wolf girl. To tell the truth, it was the V that make her of interest to me. You know she used to be on it as well, right? I'd be surprised if she still isn't."

He looked directly in her eyes as he continued...

"To speak more directly to your question. You are the one who fires my mind and my body. You are what I choose, not by the lust driven by a drug, but by love. You look in my eyes and try to tell me otherwise..."

"You are the one who fires my mind and my body. You are what I choose, not by the lust driven by a drug, but by love. You look in my eyes and try to tell me otherwise..."

At first, I thought he was stalling, but I listened. Then I heard the words I thought were untrue, but by the look in his eyes I knew the truth...he meant every word. His conviction and the way he spoke, all of it reassured me of my worst fears. I smiled and closed my eyes as a single tear rolled down my cheek mixing with rainwater. When the scent hit my nose, I quickly stood from him and distanced myself from him. Wiping at my face and trying to rid myself of the blood, I looked at him and shook my head almost fearful. "I--I--Quinn I'm--stay back."

"I--I--Quinn I'm--stay back."

Quinn smiled and stood...walking over to her, using his shirt to help her clean her tears away.

"Relax, Jessica...the elixir Vincent's people made for me...the elixir I am taking still...it suppressed that problem. As long as I take it regularly, the craving just isn't there. Yes I smell it...yes it smells good, but no drive to drink it."

Once her tears were cleared away, he tossed his shirt back to the grass and led her back to the center of the field. He laid her back down, laying next to her, kissing her gently.

I relaxed at his words, watching as he wiped the tears away with the shirt and then tossing it back to the ground. Moving me back to the spot in the clearing and kissing my lips again, I found myself in awe of him. Of course Vincent needed my blood to help him, the elixir. I understood and melted against him. My dress and hair soaked at this point, but did I care? No. Not at all. I was in his arms and that's what mattered. The smell of the rain against his skin, giving his scent a different wild smell pretty much drove me crazy at that point. I pulled away slightly and ran my finger along his bottom lip and slowly raised my eyes to his. "You always treat me like such a delicate flower...That night...well that night you..." I moved my hand and touched my own lips and smiled. "That night you kissed me...holding my hips like you did....so aggressive, so possessive." If I could have blushed I would have, I'd never told him this before. "I...I liked it. A lot."

"You always treat me like such a delicate flower...That night...well that night you... "That night you kissed me...holding my hips like you did....so aggressive, so possessive...I...I liked it. A lot."

He grinned at her admission, knowing that a human would have been blushing from such an admission. He flashed her a wicked smile.

"I'll have to keep that in mind. I guess I am so used to humans and such that I forget that I can be more free....less controlled....with you. I do not really have to worry about breaking you."

He chuckled at his own comment and let his mind wander to all sorts of interesting possibilities that presented in the future.

I smiled and looked down, biting my bottom lip and running my hand along his arm and up towards his chest. The tattoo that covered his shoulder and portion of his torso always did fascinate me. Also the feeling of his muscles and silky smooth skin. Now, it was wet from the rain and even more inviting. I could hear his heart start to beat faster as I touched him. Avoiding his eyes I smiled and leaned closer to him.

Closing my eyes as my hand continued its own exploration, my lips inches from his while the rain continued to beat down on us. I placed a soft kiss on his lips and took his bottom lip between my teeth, opening my eyes to look at him wondering if I was having an effect on him.

Quinn felt her playfully tugging on his lip as her hands explored his chest...he tried to control himself then realized that there was no need....he let the lust he was feeling and the hunger for her show in his eyes as he looked into hers. He crushed his lips to hers again, growling deeply into her mouth, never taking his eyes from hers. He pressed his body against her own, letting her feel his need, his body tensed as he tried to pace himself...